I beat cancer almost exactly 10 years ago. #KissingoffCancer

In June 2010 I was diagnosed with skin cancer, malignant Melanoma (I was 20 years old). Because I got diagnosed early, the doctor was able to remove all of the cancerous cells. He also removed a lymph node to make sure the cancer didn’t spread in my body. Thankfully it didn’t spread, so I didn’t need chemo.

Like Ralph Waldo Emerson said: “The first wealth is health.” Please go to your regular check ups to maintain your overall health.

3 Easy Steps to Participate in #KissingoffCancer :
1.Post a “kiss-themed” photo/video of yourself and tag @americancancerfund
2.Show support to the ACF with a donation.
3.Challenge your friends, family, and peers to do the same!
The American Cancer Fund is a charity that is dedicated to educating, supporting, and empowering people who have been affected by cancer. #americancancerfund

Sincerely, Joëlle

*In cooperation with @americancancerfund *

*Pictures by Vivien*

DON’T USE SOCIAL MEDIA TO IMPRESS PEOPLE, USE SOCIAL MEDIA TO IMPACT PEOPLE!

The third week of February was very interesting… I spent the third week of February in Instagram jail. That means for one whole week I was not able to comment on someone else’s picture and not even my own. I also wasn’t able to follow and connect with new accounts. It was an interesting experience. I believe Instagram thought that I am a BOT, because I was engaging so much. I was trying to answer comments on previous Instagram posts, because I was trying to catch up and connect with people. The next morning I woke up and I was blocked.

The reason I love this platform so much is because I get to connect with you. I love connecting and engaging with my audience and with new people as well. I’m so grateful for this FREE app and to be able to connect with YOU. YOU INSPIRE ME every day. Every post, every caption I write is for YOU. How I can help YOU. How I can inspire YOU to do the things that INSPIRE YOU. How I can help EMPOWER YOU!

My mission is to inspire self-empowerment and mindfulness through a visual narrative of lifestyle driven content (specifically fashion, travel, beauty). I also want to raise awareness of Domestic Violence and hope that by sharing my story it can become a page in someone else’s survival book. I want to scream it from the roof tops to reach as many survivors and victims.

It means the world to me that you are here and accompanying me on my journey. Please help me spread the message by sharing my website on your social media platform. Sharing my website helps to raise awareness on Domestic Violence, and hopefully it will reach a person who really needs to see it. Sharing the website on social Media is great, because it reaches a larger audience. There is a button at the bottom of the post that lets you share a blog post on Pinterest for example. Additionally, sharing the website on Instagram and Facebook would also reach a lot more people. The additional exposure would be really beneficial in reaching more people, and hopefully reaching one person who really needs it.

Sincerely, Joëlle

Hi friends, I’m Joëlle! There are some new faces around here, so I thought I would re-introduce myself!

1.I am a Domestic Violence, and Melanoma survivor.

2.I am 29 and I was born and raised in Hamburg, Germany and then came to New Jersey in August 2010 as an AuPair. I intended to stay for only one year, but 9 and a half years later I’m still here. My parents, brother and best friend still live in Germany.

3.I’m German and French – German is my native language, and I speak some French (it’s hard when you don’t practice!).

4.I have an Associates Degree in Communications, and am currently attending Rutgers part time to finish my Bachelors Degree in Communication, specializing in PR, and doing a minor in Digital Communication, Information and Media.

5.While finishing my Bachelors part time, I’m working full time (48hrs) as a personal assistant / caregiver during the week.

6.My favorite TV show is Friends!

7.My motto is: If you can’t do it with passion, don’t.

8.I have a rescue cat, and his name is Batman, and he’s the coolest.

9.My mission is to inspire self-empowerment and mindfulness through a visual narrative of lifestyle driven content (specifically fashion, beauty and travel). I also want to raise awareness about domestic violence and hope that by sharing my story it can become a page in someone elses’ survival guide.

I would love to learn more about you, comment one thing about yourself 🙂

Sincerely, Joëlle

IF YOU ONLY HAD THE CAPACITY TO CHANGE ONE PERSONS LIFE OR REACH ONE PERSON, WOULD YOU DO IT?
— @officiallyquigley

With that mindset on August 14. 2019 I decided to finally get out of my shell, share my story, and help other survivors find the light at the end of the tunnel.

My name is Joëlle, and I am a survivor. [Find my story in my IG highlights, or blog post HERE ]

Today, 2 years and a half later after the divorce, I lead every day with a grateful heart. Every day I remind myself what I have to be grateful for. I have a deeper connection to my soul and a loving relationship with myself. Going through this experience made me the person I am today, and I am proud. I never would have thought that I’d be strong enough, but I just kept going and pushing through. This experience taught me many valuable lessons, but above all it showed me my strength and resilience.

My mission with my blog and Instagram platform is to promote selfcare, empower women and to have a positive relationship with self through visual storytelling of lifestyle driven content (fashion, travel, beauty). I want to raise awareness of Domestic Violence and I hope that by sharing my story it can become a page in someone else’s survival guide, and show them the light at the end of the tunnel.

I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much for being here. Thank you so much for joining this journey with me.

It is okay to ask for help. Don’t be ashamed, don’t blame yourself, it is not your fault. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. YOU ARE STRONG. YOU ARE BRAVE! YOU ARE A SURVIVOR!

Sincerely, Joëlle

I am so thankful and grateful every day to be here… to be alive, to be writing this, to have the honor of you reading this, and to be part of this fashion community. Since I’ve been a little girl, I’ve always loved fashion and beauty, and it’s been an escape for me. It set my mind free. It serves a canvas for my creativity and dreams.

On August 14^th I shared my survivor story on Instagram for the first time in four separate posts. I was so nervous right before pressing the share button. I was feeling very anxious, and nauseous. But what if sharing my story, my truth, could change only one person’s life or reach only one person and become a page in someone else’s survival guide. With that mindset I decided to finally get out of my shell, share my story, help other survivors find the light at the end of the tunnel. Happiness is possible after trauma.

Part 1: I was married to my abuser.

I’ve been wanting to share this part of my story with you for a while now, but I kept putting it off. I kept finding excuses of why it wasn’t the right time. I wasn’t ready.

April 30th 2016: I was laying on my back on the living room floor, my husband was sitting on my stomach hovering over me having both his hands around my throat. I was trying to push him off, but he is so much stronger than me. I don’t know for how long I lost consciousness. After I regained my consciousness, my husband said “I want to kill you, but I’m not going to jail over you.” Words that I will never forget.

That was the beginning of my long, emotionally and physically draining fight. I did not go to the police that day. I was too scared. I didn’t tell anyone about it until 2 months after. I felt so ashamed and alone. I didn’t know where to go. Our first wedding anniversary would have been on May 21st. I called the police the next time he put his hands on me.

Part 2: Getting out of my abusive marriage.

I felt so ashamed and alone, and I didn’t know where to go. I didn’t want to tell anyone, because that would have meant that it was real and that my marriage was really over after only 11 months. I was blaming myself for not being a better wife, for my failed marriage, and that is was my fault for my husband to cheat. Our marriage was over, and he moved out on July 12th 2016. On July 31st my husband abused me the last time, and I called the police this time. I filed a restraining order and the state of New Jersey pressed charges against him for assault. The first court date was August 4th. On December 22nd 2016 I was sitting in the car on the phone with my parents (who live in Germany), tears were rolling down my cheek, after I lost the restraining order court case. The world didn’t make sense to me anymore. Not being believed, and not getting the lawful protection was devastating. I wanted to give up, but I decided to continue to fight. I decided to continue speaking up for myself in hopes that it would never happen again. On March 21. 2017 my husband got charged with assault, one year probation and I got granted a Do Not Contact Order. I asked the judge to add anger management to his probation in hopes that he would never hurt another person. On May 1st 2017 I was officially divorced. Every court date was emotionally and physically draining. There were about 12 court dates and 2 days after every court date I got sick with a bronchitis and sinus infection. My body was exhausted. I gained 30 pounds within 4 months and became pre-diabetic. The trauma was eating away at my teeth and I needed a root canal. I couldn’t handle my emotional distress by myself anymore, and I decided to get help to process my emotions.

Part 3: HEALING after abuse.

After the traumatic event on April 30th, I was diagnosed with PTSD, depression and anxiety. I had reoccurring nightmares and panic attacks, and was battling with suicidal thoughts.

I’ve been through talk therapy and cognitive behavioral therapy. After my first session of the PTSD treatment I almost quit. Reliving my trauma all over again was so emotionally and physically draining. After my first session I got a bronchitis and sinus infection again like I did after all the court dates. Dealing with the emotional stress made me physically sick, and I wanted to give up. But I’m so grateful I didn’t. I knew that if I’d quit, I’d carry the pain with me and wouldn’t be able to heal properly. While I was going through therapy I also started journaling and writing down my story. Getting all that disappointment, grief, anger, fear and sadness on paper helped let go of all the emotions I had bottled up inside me.

In my case, each PTSD session was recorded, and under my consent the recordings are currently being used to educate and train professionals to become PTSD therapists. If I can help in the education and help train future PTSD therapists, there will be more survivors that can overcome their trauma.

I went to a Social Services non profit organization for my treatment, it was completely free. The organizations mission is to provide help, hope, support and safety to survivors, from therapy, to a safe house to transitional housing.

I went to therapy for over 8 months and on August 16th 2017 I completed my PTSD treatment, and I let go of the last piece of my marriage. I threw my wedding ring into the ocean. That was exactly 2 years ago. I felt so relieved, empowered and FREE.

Unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.

Part 4: 2 years after my divorce from my abusive husband.

Going through therapy I got my life back. I got the joy for life back, and I am a genuinely happy person. The PTSD treatment gave me my life back, and I’m tearing up writing this, because without it I wouldn’t be where I am today. I’m glad I realized that I couldn’t handle processing my emotions by myself and got the help I needed. I got a second chance at life, and I am forever grateful for that.

Today I lead every day with a grateful heart. Every day I remind myself what I have to be grateful for. I have a deeper connection to my soul and a loving relationship with myself. Going through this experience made me the person I am today, and I am proud. I never would have thought that I’d be strong enough, but I just kept going and pushing through. This experience taught me many valuable lessons, but above all it showed me my strength and resilience.

I am sharing my story with you, to raise awareness of #domesticviolence Happiness is possible after a traumatic experience.

I’m so grateful for this platform and to be able to share my story with you. This platform is to encourage, motivate, show support and raise awareness. To all survivors out there, you are not alone, you are believed, you are loved, you are strong, and I stand with you. My heart is forever with you.

You are strong! You are believed! You are loved! YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

My name is Joëlle, and I am a survivor.

#BODYIMAGE #STOPBODYSHAMING #LOVEYOURBODY

When you look in the mirror, what do you see? Do you point out all the things that are beautiful about you, or do you point out every single flaw? “Ugh another pimple? My thighs look huge in this dress. I wish my arms were thinner.” I guarantee you 100% of all women and men do that from time to time. We all have something that we complain about and don’t like about our bodies, or at least we have at some point in the past. STOP! STOP comparing yourself to other people, because everyone is unique in their own way. Learn how to embrace your body and mind, THIS IS YOU. Every time I catch myself criticizing my body, or myself I replace the negative thoughts with positive ones. What good has it done to your body and your life to criticize yourself? Exactly! Replace your negative thoughts with positive ones. Embrace your mind, your body and your beauty. This is your body and your life, you are beautiful! And life is so much better being happy 🙂

“Life is as peachy as you make it.”  Thank you so much for reading and I would love to hear your thoughts. xx Joëlle

OUTFIT DETAILS:
DRESS:  (similar)
SHOES: Birkenstock (here, similar)
WATCH: Daniel Wellington (here)
BRACELET: Pandora (here)
BRACELET: Alex & Ani (here)

*This is not a sponsored post, but I tagged brands as I want to share all outfit information with you. <3

Today exactly eight years ago I got on the plane in Hamburg, Germany to fly to JFK, NYC. The plan was to stay for only one year, to learn the language better, to experience the American culture, and to explore the paths of Carrie Bradshaw and Serena van der Woodsen. What I didn’t know when I got on the plane eight years ago, was that I would end up living here and build my entire life in the States.

There is this quote that I stumbled upon this week “New Yorkers are born all over the world, and then they come to New York City and it hits them: Oh that’s who I am.” When I left the airport and saw the tall buildings, all the lights, the masses of people, everyone unique in their own way, I knew that this was the place where I belonged.

My road to permanently living here was definitely not easy, I had so many obstacles in my way and I was so close to throwing the towel and going back home to Hamburg, Germany. BUT because I have the best and most supportive parents and brother ever in Germany, I stayed. I know that sounds backwards, but they encouraged me to keep fighting for my dreams when I felt like giving up. They have always been there for me, and thank goodness to today’s technology What’s App and Skype in particular, I’m able to stay in touch with them all the time. I’m also so grateful for my friends in Germany and all the wonderful friends I’ve made in the states, that have become my family here. I’m so thankful to have such a great support system! I am very excited to see what my future has in store, if it’s living another eight years in the states or if it’s traveling the world, or moving to Paris. Who knows, anything is possible!

My message to you is that sometimes you just have to hold your breath and jump, take the leap. Yes, it will not be easy leaving your family and friends, and going WAY out of your comfort zone can be terrifying, but the best life is lived outside of your comfort zone. Keep on pushing. Take the leap. Learn a new language. Experience a new culture. Travel. Meet new people. Fall in love. All these experiences will shape the strong person you are meant to become. I am so grateful for all the experiences over the past eight years, good and bad, because I learned so much about myself and about how strong I really am. The best life is lived outside of your comfort zone! Take a leap!

I would love to hear more about your stories. What is the craziest thing you’ve ever done outside of your comfort one? Are you thinking about taking a leap, but are second guessing yourself? Thank you so much for reading and I can’t wait to read your stories. xx Joëlle

*This is not a sponsored post*

Hello my darlings, so today I’ll be sharing this super cute and comfy jumpsuit from H&M with you, and I also wanted to talk to you guys about motivation and optimism.

Do you sometimes feel like time is running so fast and you are not able to catch your breath? There are so many things on your list and you feel like you don’t have enough time for the things that really matter to you, and your own personal growth? I can tell you one thing, if it’s really important to you, you will make time for it. It doesn’t matter if it’s about your own goals, being there for a friend, or dating; you will always make time for what or who is important to you. Where there’s a will, there’s a way. Not sure if that’s the right phrase to use in English, but I basically translated it from the German phrase “Wo ein Wille ist, ist auch ein Weg.” That’s a phrase my parents used very often throughout my childhood, and still use now. I am so thankful for these wise words, because that’s where I get most of my optimism from. If I want something badly enough, there is always a way. You might have to overcome some obstacles and take some detours (that’s totally fine), but you will get there if you stay persistent, are determined and work hard.

When I travel I do not travel with my own personal photographer, most of the time I just have my tripod with me and my Canon. Occasionally I’ll ask someone to take a picture of me with my phone (the camera is just too complicated for most people, and thank you random strangers). These pictures were taken in Charleston, South Carolina. Since this was a work trip for me, and I didn’t have time to take pictures in the afternoon, I got up at 5.30am to get ready, to catch the sunrise at 6:34am and to start taking pictures on the balcony with my tripod around 7am. And I am beyond happy with the results. It is definitely harder taking pictures with a tripod, because every so often I have to check if I had the camera in the right angle, etc. With some practice you get the hang of it. My point is, that I totally could have not taken any pictures, and just complained about how I don’t have anyone to take pictures of me for my blog. Instead, I took things into my own hands. Stop making excuses, and start finding solutions to reach your goals!

As always, thank you so much for reading and I would love to hear your thoughts. xo Joëlle

OUTFIT DETAILS:
JUMPSUIT: H&M (similar, similar, similar)
SHOES: TjMaxx (similar, similar, similar)
BAG: H&M (similar)
WATCH: Daniel Wellington (here)
BRACELET: Pandora (here)
BRACELET: Alex & Ani (here)

*This is not a sponsored post, but I tagged brands as I want to share all outfit information with you. <3

Hello my loves, sorry for the lack of update the last week, but it has been a crazy week. I cannot wait to share more details with you soon, so stay tuned! 🙂

In the meantime let’s talk some summer hair trends. Having long hair takes a lot of patience and care, especially during the summer. I love wearing my hair down, but during this crazy heat I honestly prefer wearing my hair up. So I am always looking for some cute hair do’s as an alternative to wearing a bun, that won’t take me forever to create. It’s all about being creative and time efficient! Lately I’ve been obsessed with this dutch braid hair style, because it keeps my hair out of the way and it’s super trendy. Another reason why I love this hair style is, that you can wear the braids for a couple of days, and when you decide to take them out you’ll have beautiful beachy waves. Yay double score! I really love braids, and the dutch braid is a nice alternative to the french braid. When I was little my mom would always french braid my hair, because it’s a nice and easy way to keep the hair out of the way. And being the little whirlwind that I was when I was little, it was more than necessary. To be completely honest with you, I’m still trying to master the dutch braid since the braiding style is different from the french braid. But I’m optimistic that I’ll have it down in no time! 🙂

Now about my look: yup, pink is still my favorite color and this season I have been super obsessed with off-the-shoulder pieces (as I own a million by now) so I was super excited to add one in blush pink from H&M to my collection. Culottes have been my go-to all summer, because they are super comfortable. They are so versatile, you can wear them to work, to a BBQ, or to the beach. I especially like wearing them on the airplane because they are just so comfy!

What are some of your go-to summer hair dos? I would love to hear your thoughts 🙂 xo Joëlle

OUTFIT DETAILS:
BLOUSE: H&M (here, similar, similar)
CULOTTES: H&M (here)
SHOES: AVEC LES FILLES (here, similar, similar)
BAG: Michael Kors (similar, similar, similar)
WATCH: Daniel Wellington (here)
BRACELET: Pandora (here)
BRACELET: Alex & Ani (here)
EARRINGS: ALDO (similar, similar)
NECKLACE: (similar)

*This post is not sponsored, but I tagged outfit details for you. <3